“Honor the space between no longer and not yet. This space allows you to integrate all that has happened for you, everything you’ve experienced, and what you desire to create. This is the place where resilience, possibility and opportunity are born.” Nancy Levin
This month, we fell head over heels for this quote. Now more than ever, it describes exactly where we are.
There’s no going back to business as usual, even as services gradually reopen. Nor can we jump into the new norm, for there is none. We are doggie paddling in uncharted waters, together, and this is a beautiful and heartbreaking opportunity to cultivate a new relationship with space, with the unknown, and with not yet. What will you create?
We are called upon to dream, to imagine, and also to be patient. This quality is highly underrated in our on-demand, Amazon Prime, Instacart, Instagram society. “And yet patience has been linked with being a better friend and neighbor, achieving our goals, and better physical and mental health.” Kira Newman
Patience isn’t just waiting for something, but also creating the space in ourselves to allow things to unfold the way they will. And to be ok when they don’t go our way. When so many of the things we have counted upon are no longer there, like stocked shelves of toilet paper or spaghetti, patience is the cool breeze that can soothe our hot and agitated selves.
With patience, we allow things to unfold while keeping our sanity intact, our creativity flowing, and our breath regulated. Applying mindfulness and gratitude are lifesavers. Hitting the pause button in moments of frustration and despair, taking a few deep breaths, feeling our feet, and unlocking our jaw, returns us to the moment. Here we can accurately assess the situation. Is anyone going to die if such and such doesn’t happen? No? Great. Let’s calm down and make some space to feel our disappointment, anger, or whatever is arising. We can speak kindly to ourselves, recognizing that we are ultimately ok. From this place we can take stock of what we have; food, clothing, shelter, breath, sky above etc….cultivating gratitude shifts our focus into one of abundance, rather than wallowing in what we wish we had or wish was happening.
Rather than charging through our lives as usual, we have been handed the pause button. Is this how I want to live? Is this the life I imagined? Are there changes I’d like to make? Cutting out unnecessary busy-ness or letting go of relationships and obligations that don’t serve me? Are there relationships I’d like to spend more time cultivating and honoring, or would I like to add mindfulness or art to my life? This space, between no longer and no yet, is full of potential!
“The very vulnerability and openness of liminal space allow room for something genuinely new to happen. We are empty and receptive—erased tablets waiting for new words. Liminal space is where we are most teachable, often because we are most humbled.” Fr. Richard Rohr, OFM
This does not undercut the hardships and loss of this time. “Holding both at once lets us honor the pleasures and odd discoveries of quarantine without blinding ourselves to everything beyond it. It’s a way of seeing that does not back away from what is happening by pretending people are not dying, and that does not back away from what is happening by pretending people are not loving and being loved alongside this death.” Leslie Jamison
It is so hard to not travel to see the people we love, to not walk across the stage and receive our diploma let alone know if we are attending college in the fall. It is so hard not to squeeze our grandkids, take that vacation, enjoy happy hour, etc…It’s been a long time and we don’t know when it will end. There have also been tremendous losses, unspeakable losses, and our hearts are with every single one of you. And all the feelings you have are welcome. Feel them, breathe them, have a cry, have a howl. And stay in the present moment. Stay with this space of no longer and not yet, releasing how things have been, and teetering on the moment of what they will become. We are fully alive, available to ourselves, to each other (from 6’ away), and to our planet. How will we honor this moment, between what is no longer and not yet?
Feeling anxiety, stress, numbness, or overwhelm are all normal at this time, you are definitely not alone! If you would like additional support, please reach out to us. We are here, and happy to stay connected with you. At the Strength in Motion wellness community, we believe in a mind-body-soul approach towards finding and sustaining balance. We feel honored to be on your path in some way and are here to support you in living to your greatest potential. Click here to find out more information about who we are and how we may be a support to you. We are offering telehealth during this time and free consultations as always. We are here to support you.
Here’s a Playlist to support your journey!